Sunday, January 25, 2009

In need of an update

The end of last semester was crazy! Finals week was very stressful and I didn't get any Christmas preparations ready. We took a picture we wanted to send out as a Christmas card, but I put it off too long. Next year, I'm going to have it ready by Thanksgiving. You can hold me to that.

We went to Gilbert, Arizona for Christmas. I was expecting it to be warm, but it was chilly sweater weather. Ariah slept most the way home and back, so the car experience wasn't bad for the most part. I loved the enthusiasm people had down there for putting up Christmas lights. It was fun to drive around and see the fun decorations people had. Though none beat my parents (who had a lit poinsettia tree and wrapped door as part of their decor).

I love Steve's family. I love his parents and all his siblings and their families. It's so nice to not have tension there. Especially mother-in-law tension. It's sad that I hear so many girls clashing with their mother-in-laws. Linda is so sweet and thoughtful. We went shopping together one afternoon and it was so fun to be with her. No questions asked, she is my second mother. It was fun to see Linda and Len with Ariah. What doting grandparents. Ariah is quite spoiled.

We invented a board game called Shabobwa. It's kinda a mix between Sim City and Risk. We were working out the bugs, but we've had to put it on hold for the sake of our business. I will give more details on the game when we start working on it again, and if anyone wants to try it out, let us know.

I can't believe how fast time is flying. Ariah is 4 months now. She is quite a cute chunk, with big beautiful rolls in her legs (just like her mommy had as a baby). She rolls off her tummy without problem and is working on getting onto her back. She just barely started finding interest in anything we are holding or wearing, which makes holding her a lot more complicated. She is very reluctant to giggle, though we've gotten a few out of her. She likes to yell, whether happy or mad. She has a very open mouthed smile.

Steve and I celebrated our 2nd anniversary on New Year's Eve (even though it was technically Dec. 23rd when we were married). We got to go eat at La Vigna thanks to my sister Sam (thanks Sam!). Then we spent the evening home, not really having money to go anywhere. It was a lovely evening and it's been an amazing (and fast!) two years. I love my dear Steve so much, and I have never regretted being married to him.

Pictures to come (sorry, they are on my other computer, and I've done enough updating for tonight).

The Power of Agency and Change

One thing that really bothers me about human nature is that people are willing to let a characteristic they don't like be a defining part of them. Hollywood, books (from children to adults), and the media in general have been telling us these past years: "Accept yourself for who you are." This a partly ok statement. We should remember we are children of God and that we do have light and goodness in us. We also have to remember that we also have great potential, and if we are just ok with staying the way we are, we aren't progressing.

Lately, I've been a very messy person. But I don't want that to define me. Should I just say "Oh well, I'm a messy person. I can still be happy?" No! I need to improve! I am going to improve. I hope that as time passes, I can rid myself of all things I don't want to be. And I have quite the list.

It just makes me sad when someone accepts themselves to be a certain way when they don't want to be that way. I'm not saying that people need to put themselves down all the time. We need to find joy in who we are, and work to become who we want to be.

This has everything to do with agency. Most of our attributes come from the way we choose to be. We have power to change. We have the power to change our diets, habits, looks, music preferences, food preferences, sexual orientation, etc. I even argue that some disabilities can be overcome, as I have heard friends tell stories of how they overcame a disability.

One was my younger brother, who was diagnosed as being autistic at a young age. My mom didn't listen to this diagnosis, and she told my brother not to listen. They were able to overcome his learning problems within 2 years and now he is in hard classes like AP English, AP Calculus, AP Biology. He is teaching himself how to make 3D art as he desires to study Animation at BYU. He is a runner and a very social stud muffin. If my mom had just "accepted him" as what he supposedly was, he wouldn't be who he is today. I'm not trying to put down anyone with serious disabilities, I'm just trying to show the power of agency and the power of change. Of course there are disabilities that are a permanent part of a person.

So world (I include myself), don't buy into the "accept yourself for who you are" philosophy. If you have weaknesses, work to rid them from your life. That's what I strongly desire to do.

Teresa=messy right now, but I don't want to accept that. I will work until Teresa=clean.

And I will write in this blog at least once a week. Even if it's a short philosophical thought.